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She Comes First: The Thinking Man's Guide to Pleasuring a Woman (Kerner), by Ian Kerner

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“Every man’s must-read. Tell your guy to put down the remote and pick up She Comes First.”
—Cosmopolitan
Ian Kerner offers a radical new philosophy for pleasuring women in She Comes First—an essential guidebook to oral sex from the author of Be Honest—You’re Not That Into Him Either. The New York Times praises Kerner’s “cool sense of humor and an obsessive desire to inform,” as he “encourages men through an act that many find mystifying.” An indispensable aid to a healthier, more fulfilling sex life for her and him, She Comes First offers techniques and philosophy that have already earned raves from the likes of bestselling author and Loveline co-host Dr. Drew Pinsky as well as Playgirl magazine, which cheers, “Hallelujah!”
- Sales Rank: #2508 in Books
- Brand: Kerner, Ian
- Published on: 2009-02-01
- Released on: 2010-01-05
- Format: Kindle eBook
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 8.25" h x .60" w x 5.50" l, .60 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 240 pages
Amazon.com Review
"When it comes to pleasuring women and conversing in the language of love, cunnilingus should be every man's native tongue," writes clinical sexologist Ian Kerner, Ph.D. in She Comes First, a straightforward, intimate, and exuberant guide to cunnilingus. Kerner first explored "the oral caress" as a way of compensating for his "sexual inadequacies," and quickly learned that women not only welcomed but often preferred "the way of the tongue," reaching orgasm more consistently than through intercourse. Kerner educates readers about the clitoris, "the powerhouse of pleasure," with 18 parts and 8,000 nerve endings (twice as many as the penis) and describes female sexual response from "foreplay" through "coreplay" to "moreplay." A large part of the book is a graphic, detailed primer on "mouth music," including best positions, step-by-step techniques (illustrated), and tips for tongue and fingers. How long should this last? Until the woman has an orgasm or many, says Kerner, and "melts blissfully before your eyes." "The vast majority of women complain about guys who don't like to do it, don't know how to do it, or simply don't do it nearly enough," writes Kerner. This book will change that. Women: Buy it for your partner! --Joan Price
From Publishers Weekly
Dispelling the widely held myth of genital penetration as the apogee of sexual pleasure, Kerner, who holds a doctorate in clinical sexology, offers this witty, well-researched manual for "consistently leading women to orgasm" through cunnilingus. Loaded with practical anatomical information (the clitoris has 18 distinct parts, and more nerve fibers than any other part of the human body) and graphic line drawings, the book also touches on the less mechanical, more psychological aspects of oral sex, including the three assurances every woman needs from her lover to feel comfortable: (1) "you enjoy it as much as she does"; (2) "there's no rush"; and (3) "Her scent is provocative, her taste powerful: it all emanates from the same beautiful essence." Since studies show the average woman takes about 20 minutes to reach her first orgasm during a typical sex session, while men take a mere four minutes, Kerner advises men to delay their own climax and make oral sex "coreplay" ("the substantive phase in which sexual tension builds, culminates and then releases itself through the female orgasm"), instead of foreplay. Breaking down six stages of coreplay, from the "first kiss" to orgasm, Kerner speaks to both beginners and more seasoned lovers. His candor concerning his own bout with sexual dysfunction adds a compassionate tone and credibility to this decidedly pro-female methodology.
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.
Review
“Required reading for all men who are dating and all women who are wondering why they’re not satisfied.” (Cindy Chupack, writer/executive producer of Sex and the City)
“Take note, guys. This book is your secret weapon.” (Jauretsi Saizarbitoria, Jane Magazine)
“Here comes a book that puts men in their places - smack dab in between women’s legs!” (Cake)
“An entire book written strictly for the pleasure of women by a man. Hallelujah!” (Playgirl)
Most helpful customer reviews
138 of 148 people found the following review helpful.
Every 18 year old male should be required to read this book.
By E. D. Hance
I thought this book was going to be about physical technique. But, actually it is about slowing down to take a hour or longer, to delay the male's gratification, to learn to read your partner's reactions, to give pleasure without any time table or deadline, to really care deeply for another human being, to enjoy the moment, to not be offended by the smell or taste or feel of your partner, to fully enjoy just being together with another person, to be attracted to the person and want them to enjoy the time together, to have go through all stages in order to reach orgasm and then have a cooling down period of closeness. It really is a book about loving and caring. It is not just about the physical sexual technique or how to get the job done quickly or hooking up with a stranger every Saturday night. The best sex is with someone you really care about and that you take the time at a leisure pace to enjoy sharing an experience. It is sharing and caring at the deepest level.
12 of 12 people found the following review helpful.
Four thumbs up.
By Jake
Bought this as a gift for my wife (not the book silly). It's helped me be smarter in the intimacy realm. I was never afraid to "go-down" and actually quite enjoy it, but was always worried I wasn't doing things right. Well, this book confirmed that and has made me an expert. Wife gives it two thumbs up, all day, everyday. Go for it fellows!
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful.
Mandatory. Plain and simple.
By MotorcycleMan
If you love your wife (and your penis) you must read this book. It changes everything. The female anatomy is truly amazing and this book introduced me to the fantastic and splendor that is the vagina a a way that I was completely ignorant too. I appreciate my wife's body on a much more intimate level now. She loves me loving her body on a different scale too. It's a wonderful, eye opening, how to, in the art of cuninglingus.
See all 786 customer reviews...
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